This past week-end, I wasted my time setting up two unlocked Blackberry Pearls for family members, and during this rousing process decided to add MMS to my unlocked iPhone – I needed a moment or two of telecommunicatory (I love making up new words!) release from the trials and tribulations of dealing with RIM’s bastard spawn.
So, on the iPhone I open up Settings, yada yada yada, blah blah blah, there is no place on the Network screen for me to enter the MMS settings! I know the phone is capable of handling MMS – I previously had SwirlyMMS installed, noted the enabled MMS settings, but refused to drop the $12+ large for the privilege of using something I should already have available to me. It’s the principle of the thing, man. Just because Apple has decided to hang out with the telecom Death Eaters on this side of the pond doesn’t mean that they should go all-in and act like Voldemort’s bitch. Or maybe it does. I mean, really. In my quest to resolve the issue (for, like, $0.00), I discovered through the power of Google that on some 2G iPhone, access to the MMS setting is available, on others, not so much, which translates into it being as easy to fix as pushing out a software update.
So come on, Apple. Show me the magic and make me happy with a little MMS loving on my iPhone. We’ll talk about you leaving Voldemort some other time because when I look in your eyes, I can see you’re not really happy, that you die a little death everytime someone questions why you two are even still together. You even got a new OS and upgraded yourself, but does Voldemort even care? “No! I don’t want to tether tonight! And no MMS either. I’ve had a hard day killing muggles and what not! Make me some dinner!” Apple, you don’t want that for the rest of your life. You deserve better than that. Don’t you? Come on, smile… Then leave his ass.
Step out of the box
We all know someone, or “someone who knows someone” that wants an iPhone, but refuses to willingly get in bed with the telecom company currently enjoying a monogamous US relationship with said object of desire. (Apparently this thing is shaking it down with someone new in every town.)
The upshot thus far has been successful attempts to get the iPhone to stray from its domestic partner, to “explore” unknown pleasures with “others”, if you will. The Pwnage that has led to this telecommunication cuckoldry has not fully sated the desires of those who lust after the iPhone’s many 3G charms. Instead, this wicked jealousy has given rise to plots and schemes that would spirit the iPhone from its cramped, loveless quarters with promises of adventure and full-on sexy times.
With that in mind, I came across a quote, but I cannot remember the source at this moment, and I’m too lazy to look it up, that suggested T-Mobile lease some of Sprint’s 3G 1900/2100 MHz spectrum to make the iPhone fully functional on its network. If Sprint actually has 3G spectrum in that bandwidth, and this scheme could actually work, that would be absolutely wonderful! (I like T-Mobile.) This would enable Apple and T-Mobile to gain some important intelligence on the viability of officially running the iPhone on T-Mob’s network. They could gauge the iPhone’s use on its network with full 3G capabilities enabled through an on-going examination of their own parameters, as well as “listening” to the blogsphere and the mainstream media (which would eventually get round to writing articles based on select blog posts).
Judging by the backlash against That Other Telecom Co. through searches on Google and Twitter, there is substantial dissatisfaction and pent-up demand in the U.S. for the world’s greatest daily-use electronic device. And judging by the number of unlocked iPhones all ready in use on T-Mob’s network (and no, I don’t have any verifiable data, just a hunch), there are a lot of people in this country with telecommunication itches that are just not being scratched.
The time has come for the iPhone to find a new partner, maybe try an open relationship or just go balls-deep in a 3G telecommunications orgy and let every able-bodied carrier have a go…